Letting go has become such a trendy, hollow phrase. Usually because it is missing the other boundary tightening the scope of its meaning, but sometimes because bad teachers tell you to let go of everything. Don’t let go of good morals!

Letting go is a skill, and it should be trained until you can do it spontaneously for as long as the moment requires it. Once you have this skill firmly under your belt (or suspenders, I don’t judge), you can start figuring out where to apply your newly mastered skill. Pretty soon aftert figuring out where letting go belongs, you figure out where it isn’t helpful. At this point you’re letting go of letting go. Radical.

Sustaining this release is having a good enough instinctual grasp of the dependency of your identity, your soul. It stems from recognizing the uncountable number of dependencies and influences on your identity. It is a fundamental understanding of how this identity/soul is mutable, inconsistent, and fabricated due to many conditions. After that, you can choose when your identity is beneficial to the world at every present moment.

Aang opening his chakras bro

The season two finale of Avatar: The Last Airbender sparked this conversation with my fiancee, so I’ll address the rest of this article to her. I’m not letting go of you. I’m letting go of my identity based around you. When my identity as your fiancee/husband makes me excessively miserable, it’s good to let go of that identity. For instance, when I’m missing you excessively, fearing your death, only being happy when I’m with you, etc. it’s skillful to let go of that identity. On the other side, if my identity as a husband/fiancee leads me to being an exemplary steward of the world, then it’s good to hold on to that. When I take extra care of myself, extra care of all my friends, extra empathy for new stories, and so on because of who I am in this beautiful relationship, it’s skillful to not let go of this identity.

I can hold you in my arms while not holding onto you. Our lives are so brief, and we dont know when we’re done. Every day with you is satisfying, fulfilling, and meaningful. With the ability to let go of some burdens, every day can be a bright day to spread infectious compassion.